Matahari ada 2

M : "Bu guru,,,"
G : "Ya nak ..."
M : "Matahari kok cuma ada 1 Bu guru??"

Lalu gurunya mangeluh dan melotot muridnya dan menjawab..

 G : "Aduuh elu gimana sih.. satu aja mataharinya item lu udah kaya begini, apa lagi dua,......!!"

blog ane yang lain :

jokesthining.

Masuk yuk

Saat kau sedih tak satupun yang menyadari kesedihanmu. Saat bahagia tak satupun melihat senyummu. Tapi saat kamu KENTUT, semua menoleh kepadamu. MENYEDIHKAN SEKALI...;

mampir diblog ane yang lain demari........

Jokesthining.

Fungsi dari tombol "ENTER".

Mas Pur jalan2 ke kuto solo mau lihat pameran komputer. Mas Pur penasaran dgn tulisan “ENTER” di keyboard komputer, trus tanya SPG yg bagikan brosur.

 “Mbak tanya dong, ‘ENTER’ ini maksudnya apaan sih?”

Ternyata SPG-nya juga gaptek. “Kayaknya utk mempercepat program aja Mas!” Mas Pur : “Mempercepat gimana maksudnya Mbak?”
SPG : “Ya mempercepat aja mas, kan kalo tulisannya ‘ENTAR’ jadinya lama!”
Mas Pur : ?!?####$

Jokesthinking.silahkan mojok ke blog ane yang lain,klik demari icon below

peeping girls change clothes

Previous sorry if repost, if funny please comment.
Jokesthinking.

Termometer pantat

ini ada sebuah cerita singkat

 Suatu hari ada seorang wanita cantik berobat.

Wanita : “Doik,saya sakit apa yah? kepala saya pusing,kalau malam badan meriang..

Dok : “Yaudah..,coba naik ke ranjang..,saya periksa”

Setelah beberapa lama..

Dok : “Saya ukur pakai termometer dulu yah?”

Wanita : “Ok,,, Dok ”

Dok : “Tapi…,termometer buat ketek sama mulut lagi dicuci,sisanya cuma termometer pantat..,gimana,mau..?”

Wanita : “Boleh deh Dok…,daripada gak sembuh…”

lalu ditusukkanlah termometernya….cruttssss…

Wanita : “AAAKKHHHHH…,itu mah bukan lobang pantat Dok …!!!”

Dok : “Sama…,ini juga bukan termometer koq,hehehe…”

Jokesthinking.

Ngemut Lampu(Heboh).

guru : anak2 coba buat kalimat memakai kata ngemut..
Murid : adik ngemut permen
guru : pinter..
Murid2 : mama ngemut lampu..
Guru : kok bisa???
Murid2 : bisa bu beneran
guru : masa sih???
Murid2 : iya bu, semalem saia denger sendiri mama bilang gini, pa buruan matiin lampunya, trus mama emut..
Guru : ??

Jokesthinking

Karya Ilmiah

Guru: Apa yang dapat kamu sumbangkan untuk LKIR sekolah kita?
Murid: Sebuah penemuan dari penelitian yang saya lakukan sendiri.
Guru: Apa itu?
Murid: Menggabungkan (stek) 2 jenis tumbuhan yang sangat berlainan spesiesnya, dan ternyata berhasil.
Guru: Apa 2 jenis tumbuhan itu ?
Murid: Kelapa dan singkong.
(Guru, terdiam sepertinya tidak percaya.)Guru: lalu apa yang terjadi dengan tumbuhan itu?
Murid: Jadi GETUK.
Guru: Wrakakakakakak......plak,plok,plak,pluakk!!!!
Murid : oknam.

jokesthinking.

Create who like booze

one night there are 3 thugs who were drunk and the third thug taxi. taxi driver was confused "These people do not understand well drunk by taxi and the taxi driver started the engine only just past the taxi driver said" mas had reached "and the thugs first came out and said thank you .. yes while pay, civilian pay and leave both without speaking any third thug out when the driver was shocked because it was slapped by the three thugs and the driver asked "why me loh slap" and thugs answered "do not drive a taxi speeding-speeding a lot of small children"

jokesthinking.

by not wearing underwear can earn money

Surti (4th) climbed a tree but forgot to wear pants dalam.tiba once there was a young man passing by, hey Surti, down cepat.malu judging people ...... then Surti itu.kemudian down toward the young boy gave him the money $ 50 Surti said and told his mother to buy panties mengantarkanya.
Surti home not long after telling his mother. his mother thought that small children can be $ 50 if I would definitely be a lot ...... with a laugh.
speedy way the story, that afternoon her mother Surti climb trees without wearing underpants while waiting for the young man passed again.
ya it is also true, so the young man's passing, saying parents crazy .....!! down here, your pubic hair visible. so down from the tree Surti mother smiling. hehehe ..... ya want to give me money?
the young man said, "yes, I gave $ 2 to buy a razor shaving, I see your pubic hair is thick, trim it.

 laugh before you laugh.

Sumpah Dokter

Nggak tahan beban emosional, akhirnya temen ane yang notabene DOKTER itu curhat:
begini curhatanya..,
“Mas Peng, bagaimana ya menghilangkan kebiasaan selingkuh dengan para pasienku? Aku telah langgar sumpah dokterku!”
  lalu ane mencoba menghibur: “Sudahlah. Normal pria selingkuh dengan wanita. Apalagi kamu belum menikah.”
Dokter makin murung: ” Tapi Peng, aku ini kan dokter hewan?”

wrakakakakakaka......

jokesthinking,clapMangap!! 

ANGGOTA DPR DI RAMPOK

Perampok : "Berikan semua uangmu!!!"
DPR : "Tidak! Kau tak tahu aku ini Anggota DPR-RI!!"
Perampok : "Kalau begitu, berikan semua uangku sekarang!!!"

hummor SEGAR...

Tips agar dikejar wanita.

jurus ampuh agar cewek mengejarmu.
langsung ke TeKaPe :

1. Perlahan dekatin dia.
2. Tatap wajahnya dengan seksama.(buang jauh muka mesum),cool&jangan tegang,grogi/minder.
3. Beri senyuman manis untuknya.
4. Buat dia terlena.
 lalu.....
5  Lalu pelan - pelan....

 pelan
pelan
pelan pelan..


kamu nungging
lalu kentutin dia
hahaha
pasti kamu di kejar-kejar sama dia.

Jokesthinking....clapSad!!

sekandal remas-remas susu dikandang.emang guwe JABLAY??

Ayam : Gwe benci banget sama manusia.
Sapi : Lah, mang lo napa..yam??
Ayam : masa gww baru makan beras dikit aja, langsung diusir, sampe di lempar-lempar batu segala. Padahal mereka ampir tiap ari makan telur dan daging gwe. Sebel!!! benci bngt gwe sama yang namanya manusia.
Sapi : Emang lo doang yang benci???? Gwe lebih benci mereka dari siapapun!
Ayam : Emang lo kenapa.. pi?
Sapi : Coba elo bayangin, ampir tiap hari susu gue di elus-elus, dipencet-pencet, diremas-remas, tapi manusia durjana itu ga pernah nikahin gwe, boro-boro ngelamar... Sakiiiittt banget batin gwe.emang guwe JABLAY apa??!!

Criteria for ideal husband

looking for the best of the best a woman was set criteria for who want to propose to her.

1. Do not like to glance at another woman;
2. Never slap the wife;
3. Do not run away from responsibility,
4. Satisfactory in bed.


The next day at his home revealed. Dhok ... ... dhok dhok ... The woman was surprised not to play. In front there is a blind man without hands, and feet.

"Are you looking for a man who fit the criteria you announce?" Said the man.
"Yes, you who?" Replied the woman.
"I want to propose you" said the man.
"Wow this guy bener reckless." Thought the woman.

Men who use a wheelchair said, "I was blind, so there can be looked at another woman, I do not have hands, which might be able to hit you. I also do not have legs, certainly would not run. "

"But if you are able to satisfy me?" Says the woman.
"You really underestimate me, you thought I was knocking the door pake what?"

women: "#*@$?+"@*+..?!?!?" (fainting)

The characteristics of aging

1. Reading further, closer urine.
2. See you nouse first sleep, sleep now see you back.
3. It used to wear perfume, wear oil now the wind.
4. It used 4 times a week, now 4 weeks.
5. Once that hard difficult limp, limp now difficult hard.
6. It used often to a discotheque, now often to the pharmacy.
7. It used to drink milk, drink herbal now.
8. It used to relax in a massage parlor, now relax in nursing homes.

 a success when I can make you laugh.

foto keren sepanjang masa

jokestingking.

cara jitu menghindari tilang

simak percakapan berikut :
dijamin NGAKAK kl tidak ane cium itu zaskia meca, brrrrrrrgggh

Pol*si : Kamu saya tilang! Mana sim kamu??
pemuda : Ini pak... SIM salabimm 50ribu...
pol*si : pinterrrr...
?????????????
Jokestingking.

Gadis diperkosa 3 Pelaku Bergiliran di Atas Pohon.

<div><div style="margin: 5px;">
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</div>
<div class="alt2" style="border: 1px inset ; margin: 0px; padding: 6px;">
<div style="display: none;">

  </div></div></div></div>
 sekedar buat ngebantu agan-agan Ngakak.
Jokingtingking.(smile)

Maintaining the printer modification

for how to properly care :
1. Printer modification should not be taken with atilted or inverted position.
2. Position the bottle should be level with the printer.
3. When the printing process begins, small caps should be opened.
4. If the printer you want to move the place, all the cap on the bottle should be tightly attached.
5. When the bottle will be filled in all caps should be opened, filling the ink can be performed on a large hole in the bottle.
6. If the print is less satisfying to do head cleaning process.
7. If the ink on the bottle is ¼ do immediately charging the ink.
8. Dispose of waste ink if it is ½ or ¾ of the bottle.
9. Do not let the ink on the bottle completely - completely exhausted.
10. Not attempted to change the brand of ink

mothers bike races

On a Sunday, the mothers of a bevy of elite gymnastics in the complex events, a bike race. Competition held dikomplek football field as well. The competition is endurance bike ride around the field. Mothers who got the first turn starting with his own style but the only strong one round only. Likewise, the second and subsequent mothers with their respective styles, but already struggling diputaran first. After the turn of the fifth mother calmly and in a style other than another in the fifth round still looks cheerful, even until the tenth round did not want to stop if not stopped by another mother. Obviously this is a champion.
Mothers who first asked on the champion's mother,:
"What does Mom really strong prescription to ten times?"
Mother calmly replied champion:
"My bike without a saddle ... ... ..."

TUHAN tidak terus diam begitu saja.

singkat ceritera disaat kita menginginkan binatang yang cantik nan lucu,yang kita dapat hanyalah seekor ulat bulu.terkadang orang akan putus dan menyesali diri ketika apa yang meraka dambakan,inginkan dan impikan tidak sesuai dengan apa yang menjadi harapanya.Lalaikah Kita dengan Ke AGUNGAN TUHAN??dengan ulat berbulu itu kan menjadi kupu-upu yang cantik,menawan menghiasi taman.SUBHANALLAH.....
 sering kali kita menyerah diri,pasrah tanpa berusaha untuk bangkit kewmbali dan memupuk kesabaran kita.
 TUHAN tidak memberikan apa yang kita harapkan,tetapi TUHAN memberikan apa yg lebih kita butuhkan.

 Sedikit coretan dengan gaya bahasa yang belum bisa begitu tertata rapi,Semoga bermanfaat untuk kita semua.

 Tetep Semangat,Sopan dijalan,Santun dilingkunagan,Ta'at Kepada Yang Di ATAS dan Hormat Kepada Orang Tua.

suka duka anak kos

jadi anak kos emang harus mandiri. yang kerasa bnget ga enaknya waktu lagi sakit &puasA.kalau sakit tetep harus ngurus diri sendiri,ga kayak dirumah ada yg masakin dll.Tapi enaknya juga banyak kok.anak kost enak buat di pacarin.kan bebas bisa ngapain aja,trmasuk KUMPUL KEBO yg penting ga hamil.

sekedar buat perenungan saja.tinggal bagaimana kita menyikapinya.ibarat pisau bisa kita gunakan untuk hal yang berguna dan bermanfaat atau untuk kejahatan/menyelakai orang lain.

Mengapa dan kenapa kita tidak BAHAGIA?

seringkali kita terlalu bangga akan apa yang kita miliki.entah harta,kdudukan ataupun jabatan.hingga akhirnya ita hanyut dalam kemewahan,hura-hura dan senang-senang dalam menikmati hasil jerih payah usaha kita.namun demikian kita sering lupa akan KUASA TUHAN.hingga akhirnya kita lupa akan kebesaranya dan anugerah yang TUHAN berikan kepada kita.kurangnya rasa syukur kita inilah yang membuat kita tidak BAHAGIA.

 Hargai apa yang kita miliki, Selalu mnjalankan perintah dan laranganya, Patuh kepada Orang tua,Rajin belajar,tekun bekerja, Hormat kepada guru, Niscaya kita aan BAHAGIA.

 by. bangtoz
 djogja, 09112011